Letter Two

July 5th, 2006

Dear Baby, 

Hey sweet baby, it’s your mommy! I don’t know yet if you will be a girl or a boy I find out in just a few weeks! It’s crazy how much life changes when you find out you’re having a baby. I was running track for my College when I found out I was pregnant. 

Which means, you’ve already ran your first track meet! I’m hoping that you will be a jock like me and love to do sports! I wonder if you’ll be tall like your dad? I am only 5’2’ but he is 6’2” so chances are you could be tall; which would be great for basketball!!

I know that I didn’t plan to have a baby right now in my life. Truth is I always planned to be married and finished with college, I would be happily married for a few years, I’d be a few years into my teaching career before I would have kids. I would be fully ready to have kids! Well life doesn’t often turn out the way you plan. I’m kinda the queen of figuring out how to make things great even when the circumstances aren’t ideal.

Since you won’t read this letter until you are older I’m going to be honest with you. My life isn’t in a good place right now, my circumstances are defiantly not ideal. Having a baby not married and in a challenging relationship was not my plan. Me and your dad have a hard relationship. I was just about to make changes and move out when I found out that you were coming. 

You are not the problem at all. It’s us, we both have a lot of work to do on ourselves. But we’re willing to work on things and make the best life that we can for you. When your dad found out about you he decided to buy a house so that you would have a home to come home to. We are going to try to make this all work for you.

This may not be the best time to be having a baby, but I am so happy to be your mom. All my life I have dreamed of being a mom and having a little baby to take care of. Sweet baby, I love  you already and I haven’t even met you! I promise that I will do my very best and take care of you! It’s true, I may not know what I am doing being a mom, but I will figure it out! 

So far you are the best thing that has happened to me in my twenties, I have already grown up so much just knowing that I know have a child to take care of! Sweet little blessing, I am so thankful that God brought you to me. As I feel you inside of me, I already have such an amazing connection to you. 

Love, 

Your Mom