Overwhelmed

We're home from the Hospital, which is great news but now it's all starting to hit me. I'm pretty overwhelmed today from all that's happened. This morning while taking care of Noel I counted 10 machines in her room all used to keep her alive; everything from a ventilator to I.V. pumps, to suction machines, oxygen and on and on it's a lot to do. In the hospital she had many doctors, nurses, CNA's and respiratory therapist to help care for her, now it's just me while Dustin's at work. I also still have to take care of two other kiddos. Noel's feeling great and it so happy to be home. But I could really use extra pray today just to make it through. God never gives more than we can handle right? Some days are harder than others though. Thanks for checking in and again thanks for the prayers, Tina

Friday

Thank you for all the prayers they are so appreciated! All your prayers helped make today a good day. The doctors made a quick decision (which I didn't think was possible) and decided the best "Plan" is to put Noel on TPN for an extened amount of time. This is good and bad. Good because Noel will finally get full nutrition, Total Parenteral Nutrition (TPN) is a way to feed someone through their veins when they can't get feed through their stomach. This is why she had to get a PICC line today; a PICC line is a semi-permanent I.V. She can come home with the PICC line and it can stay in her arm for up to two months. This means she will be getting TPN at home. She had to go under anesthesia this afternoon while they put the PICC line in. She did awesome and everything went great. So now the bad part; Noel will now be more at risk for getting an infection because of the PICC line. This means that she could get a blood infection very easily, if the PICC line isn't cleaned right or if some bacteria gets into the line she can get really sick really fast. So we still need lot's of continued prayers. She's had a similar PICC line in the past, at one point she was on TPN for 9 months; so none of this will be new to me but it does make an already hard job of taking care of her harder. I'm convinced that her Muscle disease effects her stomach and we'll just have to make progress little by little with trying to get it to work properly. But now at least she'll be gaining weight and getting the nutrition she so desperately needs.

This Stinks!!

Noel is back in the hospital; she's lost 3 pounds. She has been having a hard time eating, just like always. It's the story of her life. I'm so ready for answers.
Can I just vent for a moment? I know many people see the side of me that's positive and "handles it so well" but for a moment I need to be human, I need to not have it all together. This really sucks! This life is so hard. Every plan I've made in the past four years has been changed. Tonight is just one example, I was suppose to have a Grand Opening for Pampered Chef, something I've been so excited about, so looking forward to, and yes once again plans changed. It use to be easier when the only life that had to be affected by Noel's hospitalization was mine; now so many lives are, we have to find out how to continue to care for our other two kiddos when they're not allowed in the hospital room with Noel. It sucks that her stomach doesn't work, it sucks that she's in and has been in so much pain just to eat! Eating, something we all take for granted... as I'm typing this I'm eating a snack and I don't have to worry about if my body will or won't digest it, Urrgghh!! Don't get me wrong I know that God has a plan and I know His ways are better than mine; I know that somehow this all fit's into His plan. But I also know that He is a big God and it's ok that sometimes I get frustrated and sometimes I don't understand it all and sometimes I don't have it all together. I know it's ok for me to feel these things because He never gets frustrated, He knows it all and He always has it together. I know I'll get through because of Him, not because of me. I know that His grace is sufficient for today for me and I know that it's sufficient for you too. Please continue to pray for us through this time: Pray for answers, SOLUTIONS, grace, healing, strength and quickness for all of us. I'll update more about Noel when I know what the "plan" is. Thanks for letting me vent,
Tina